TV Competition Couples TMM Style!
by Blooming-Fire-Flower
Summary: I simply love TV Show competitions! Don't you? So now, it's my turn! What happens when the TMM Team and Aliens team up in a crazy TV Show rendered even crazier by my epic craziness? Sure you wanna find out? I promise to try to update a lot! But then, I thought, this is boring. So guess what, Inuyasha fans? You'll be seeing a piece of your favorite mikos and demons(later on)! Enjoy!
1. Episode 1

TV competition; TMM Style

**Host:** HELLO, AND WELCOME TO MARCIE'S SHOW-

**Fire-Bloom:** Wait, what? Marcie's show? This is a TV Show Competition TMM Style!

**Host:** (shuffles through cards) Ooops, got that wrong! I'm sorry! Restart! Re-

**Fire-Bloom: **(growls) NO! OUT! OUT! OUT WITH YOU! (Kicks host out) I WAS STUPID TO HIRE YOU! I'LL DO IT MYSELF!

(People rush in to add cloth to Fire-Bloom's dress, put make-up, etc.)

**Fire-Bloom:** (puts on big smile) Hello! Welcome to the TV Show Competition, TMM Style! (Crowd applauds) I would now like you to all greet our competitors!

ICHIGO! (A light goes onto Ichigo, transformed and puzzled) MINTO! (Another light goes onto a transformed Minto, who replaces her dazed look by one of pure vanity) RETASU! (Retasu squeaks and tries to hide behind something, transformed as well) PURIN! (Purin jumps onto a ball that pops out of nowhere, yellow like her outfit she's wearing (gosh whatever (THEY'RE ALL TRANSFORMED!)) ZAKURO! (Zakuro instinctively takes a model pose) KEI-

**Ichigo:** HEY! WHY CAN'T I TRANSFORM!

**Fire-Bloom:** SHUT UP! I'll come to it later, be patient! As I was saying: KEIICHIRO AND RYOU! (Keiichiro waves and Ryou glares, making the crowd nearly faint) AND THE ALIENS! PIE, TART, AND KISH! (Crowd goes even wilder, some people faint, medics rush in, and Kish waves at Ichigo) AND MASAYA! (Ichigo squeaks happily, Kish and crowd 'boo' and glare) Nah, kidding, he's giving the Bengal tigers a little visit! (Trapdoor opens under Masaya, growls, screams and roars are heard, and while Kish and crowd cheer, Ichigo faints) You'll have to get used to it, Ichi. There's no way you're ending up with HIM in HERE.

**Ichigo:** (wipes tear away) NOW TELL US WHAT THE HELL WE'RE DOING HERE AND WHY I CAN'T DETRANSFORM!

**Fire-Bloom:** Woah! Calm down! But ok! You've been respectfully kidnaped to attend and participate in my TV show, and you can't transform because, seeing I'm the authoress, I decide what happens. (Everyone stares at her like she's crazy) HEY! I AM crazy! But now, down to business! I decided to team you up as twos of opposite gender. I already chose the pairs!

(The pair names flash on screen; Minto and Ryou, Zakuro and Keiichiro, Retasu and Pie, Purin and Tart, Ichigo and Kish)

**Ichigo:** I'm not feeling well right now...

**Kish:** (punches air triumphantly) YES! YES! YES!

**Retasu & Pie:** (blush and glance at each other)

**Purin:** (glomps Tart)

**Minto, Ryou, Keiichiro, Zakuro:** (Glances at partners, then snap heads away)

**Fire-Bloom:** 'Kay! Now that everyone's ok-

**Ichigo:** NO! NO I'M NOT OK! I WANNA CHAAAAAAAAAAAANGE!

**Fire-Bloom:** Shut up. Now, here's the point of the thing; the pairs to go out will HAVE to take those and be together forever! (Takes out 5 velvet-lined boxes. In the first, for Minto and Ryou, are two silver rings with a blue bird made of sapphire on each, for Zakuro and Keiichiro, silver with diamond wolf heads, Retasu and Pie, silver with aiguemarin dolphins, for Purin and Tart, silver with citrine bananas, and finally, for Kish and Ichigo, silver with a yin-yang sign but in pink and green so made of diamond and emerald) (smirks) Each is supplied with a silver chain in case you prefer pendants!

**Ichigo:** (claws at own throat) NO! Please, I beg you! Is there any way to escape it?!

**Fire-Bloom:** (smirks some moar) Yup! To be first place! Then, the pair decides to take the rings or not! Their choice! Also, they get separate tickets for whenever they want to a certain aquatic park! Goodbye, folks, and stay tuned for the next episode of TV competition couples, TMM Style!

**Ichigo:** Hey! The name changed!

**Fire-Bloom:** Shut up! Or do you want to have the ring forced on?!


	2. Chapter 2

**I'm sorry! I know! But I had no electricity for practically forty-eight hours! ;n; please don't hate me!**

**Now, I'll probably massacre the characters' personalities and behaviors...**

**=_= please don't kill me?! Now, I must say I'm sorry for the whole not updated in ages thing, but I couldn't help it! Gak! Oh well, I hope you still keep on reading! Also, I want at least five voting reviews to continue, as you choose who wins! So vote for whom to go out this time! **

**AND DISCLAIMER! SORRY I FORGOT LAST TIME! I DON'T OWN ANY CHARACTERS EXCEPT FIRE-BLOOM! (That's me!)**

**Fire-Bloom:** Heeeeeeeeeeeello everyone and WELCOME to TV Competition Couples TMM Style which I shall now call TVCCTMMS 'cause imma lazy. (Crowd cheers) But. I thought: this is already boring. So, I won't be writing anymore. (Crowd boos) JOKING! (Cheers) But it's still boring. (Boos) So- (Cheers) I'll be changing stuff- (Boos) like- (Cheers) ad- (Boos) SHUT UP! (Shut ups) So, as I was saying, before being RUDELY INTERRUPTED (Glares at crowd), I am going to change stuff, like adding new competitors! (Crowd cheers, getting warning glares from Fire-Bloom) This is a crossover after all! And what better than Inuyasha?! So! The teams are; SESSHOMARU AND KAGOME! (Sesshomaru had to be sedated because he was too angry, so he's snoring away, but Kagome stares at the cheering crowd) INUYASHA AND KIKYOU! (They are caught in the act of kissing) MIROKU AND SANGO! (While Sango waves at the crowd, Miroku reaches for her and gets slapped) RIN AND SHIPPOU! (The two wave at the crowd and bounce up and down) And finally, I decided to make an animal's team! (On stage appear Mikey, Masha, Ah-Un, and Kirara) Yes, they can win, but they have no rings! The other Inuyasha competitors, on the other hand, do! I won't re-explain the rules 'cause imma lazy!

**Sesshomaru:** *snore* (Wakes up) GAH! Uh? Wut? What is going on?! This Lord Sesshomaru demands to know!

**Fire-Bloom:** (smiles big, fake, annoyed smile) As I said before, I shall not repeat the rules 'cause I'm lazy! Oh, and the rings! (So, they all have yin-yang like Kisshu and Ichigo, also all silver and with the chain, but for Sesshy and Kags, original, so black and white, for Inuyasha and Kikyou, red and white, Miroku and Sango, blue and pink, and the animals just have normal pendants, for Masha 2 shades of pink, for Mikey, cream and white, for Ah-Un, green and black, finally, for Kirara, black and cream, but the two small round things in the middles are red) Ok, so now, we'll start off on the first-

**Sesshomaru:** I SAID, THIS LORD SESSHOMARU DEMANDS TO KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON!

**Fire-Bloom:** Jeez, calm DOWN! Just ask THEM! (Points at the Mews, who are yelling at each other while all the boys have their heads in their hands)

**Kagome:** (eye twitches) who the heck are those?

**Fire-Bloom:** (glares) go ask! (Sighs) Let's have a small, 5 minutes pause!

5 minutes later

**Fire-Bloom:** 'Kay, everyone knows everything, and before something insane happens, let's start FINALLY upon the first challenge: MASTER CHEF!

**Sango:** (groans) you expect KIRARA?!

**Sesshomaru:** and AH-UN?!

**Ryou:** as well as MASHA?!

**Minto:** with MIKEY?!

**Everyone:** to COOK?!

**Fire-Bloom:** (shuffles uneasily) Um, well, yah...

**Kagome:** No way I'M a judge, I don't wanna die!

**Fire-Bloom:** Whatever, you aren't anyways! The judges are people from the two animes who aren't participants! So, I present you: Naraku, Kagura, Deep Blue, and Koga! (They all look dazed and blink around) I'll quickly explain; you're gonna have to test their (points at participants who glower at the judges who gulp) menus, and yes, you may be the subject of food poisoning.

**Naraku:** (whining) I don't want to be poisoned by Kirara!

**Deep Blue:** And I'm not letting my ancient generals cook a meal for me (shakes head)

**Fire-Bloom:** (Smiles big, fake, annoyed smile while rolling eyes) Riiiiiiight, but you see, ahhh... How do I say it? You do not have a choice. Now shut up and get prepared for meals. The special ingredient that HAS to be used is; (pauses)

**Tart:** Eh, is she waiting for a drum roll?

(Drum roll)

**Pie:** I guess there's your answer.

**Fire-Bloom:** FISH!  
**Ichigo:** I just became vegetarian for as long as this episode lasts so I can't do it.

**Fire-Bloom:** (raises eyebrows) Oh, really? (Wiggles fish under Ichigo's nose)

**Ichigo:** (arches back) MROW! MY FISH! (Bats at fish)

**Fire-Bloom:** Have I made a point? Now, you have 2 hours! Chiefs; GO!

I'll now change my writing style, but just for now so it's easier.

Ichigo's team isn't doing too well; While Kisshu puzzles over a human cookbook, Ichigo is gulping down all the fish. Zakuro has no idea whatsoever what to do, while Keiichiro attempts at a fish cake after completing a mouth-watering sardine salad and salmon gratin. Pudding and Tart are just searching for sugar to get high, while Minto and Ryou don't even know what a spatula looks like. Lettuce shyly shows Pie how to make fish brochettes, so the two are good enough. Now, the others from Inuyasha are a total disaster. As Shippo and Rin heap vanilla, orange slices, fish and rice together, Kagome is trying to knock some sense into Sesshomaru who insists upon cooking the fish with its scales. Inuyasha and Kikyou are just staring goo-goo eyed at each other, but the worst is the animal's team. Ah-Un and Kirara are knocking down stuff while Masha is looking up (without success, I cut the Wi-Fi) recipes, topped off by Mikey disrupting the other groups. The judges just stare. "This is NOT going well!" sighed Kagura. Koga furiously scribbles on a piece of paper. "What in the world are you doing?" asks Deep Blue (sooooooo, in a way, Masaya didn't die!). "Writing my testament!" whimpers the demon wolf. He gazes at the camera pointing at him. "Ayame, my dear, I love you! Goodbye! Goodbye, wolf pack! Your leader shall die at means of certainly dishonoring means!" Fire-Bloom rolled her eyes at that point. "No need to be so dramatic!" she cries out, then a small 'pop' sound resounds, the sound of over a dozen jaws dropping down in perfect harmony, only obtaining a shrug from the crazy authoress. "What?" She asks. "After all, I choose if you die or not! Now, don't anger me, or then I am sure to kill you all." Everyone pays her a compliment, and then shuffles back to the disastrous kitchen.

TIME'S UP!

**Fire-Bloom:** (waves at camera) Hello all! We are back with completed meals! First shall pass Ichigo and Kisshu!

(Ichigo walks up gingerly, presenting the last fish with ketchup slapped onto it. Kisshu shows a beautiful, artistic fishbone sculpture)

**Deep Blue:** I'm NOT tasting that. (FB glares at him) *sigh* ok... (Picks a bit, then tastes before retching) IT'S RAW!

**Koga, Naraku and Kagura:** Ehhhhhhh, no thanks! One out of ten!

(Next are Zakuro and Keiichiro, who present delicious-looking stuff)

**Deep Blue:** Not bad, only, the desert is a FISH CAKE. Eight out of ten.

**Koga:** I agree. Seven out of ten.

**Naraku:** I find that in the sardine salad, the mushrooms and sardines don't balance out well enough. A touch of paprika should be added, and adding carrots wasn't a good idea as they nullify the sardine's slight sweet savor, which is unique to them. The gratin was well made, only the salmon was a bit dry around the edges, and adding that slight powdering of Parmesan countered the subtle, fresh taste of the cream. Finally, the cake wasn't as bad as it seemed; flounder doesn't taste bad with carrots and cream, the only problem being the sugar, as flounders are also commonly cooked with flour. All in all, I decided the menu deserved a nine.

(Everyone stares at Naraku)

**Naraku:** What? (Shrugs) Nobody said evil couldn't be a culinary genius!

**Kagura:** (mumbling) I think I'll just give the goddamn thing an eight out of ten and become the split personality of someone else...

**Fire-Bloom:** (snaps out of it) Ahhhhhhh... Next up, Lettuce and Pie, as teams Ryou and Minto, and Pudding and Tart don't have anything to present. (Pudding and Tart are bouncing on the walls while Minto and Ryou are still trying to find how to put an oven on.)

(Pie mumbles something about human customs as Lettuce lays out fried fish brochettes and fish ramen)

(Everyone directs their gaze at Naraku who smacks his lips)

**Naraku:** So, the brochettes are simply wonderful! A hint of Tabasco, unsalted, no pepper, and fresh from the day! I can also tell you rubbed some lemon onto it right before serving! Wonderful! The problem is the fish ramen as the noodles are slightly over-cooked and the fish is slightly waterlogged. All in all, this gets a nine out of ten!

**Koga, Kagura, and Deep Blue:** (mumbling) same as him...

**Fire-Bloom:** This is getting weirder and weirder! Well, now Rin and Shippo!

(The kids enter with a mess, which seems to have as identifiable ingredients, among other, orange, mango, pimento cheese, rice, and cow horns. Note I didn't say fish)

**Fire-Bloom:** (raises and eyebrow) Are you SURE you put fish in that? (The two kids nod uncertainly) Oh well...Judges? Taste! (Shivers then mutter under breath) I'm happy I'M not a judge!

**Naraku:** (twitches, then slowly falls to side to crumple onto the floor) Gaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh...

(Everybody stares at him then at FB, who gawps at him)

**Fire-Bloom:** I DIDN'T WRITE THAT!

**Naraku:** (sighs, gets up and dusts off clothes to everyone's amazement) *sigh* was this dramatic enough to represent my displeasure at this culinary disaster? But as they made me discover turbo goes well with clementine, I give a six out of ten!

(The other judges mumble some kind of agreement)

**Fire-Bloom:** (mumbling) maybe this challenge wasn't such a good idea... Well, next up, Kagome and Sesshomaru!

(They present a roasted fish, which seems to be glazed and crispy)

(Naraku is, once again, the center of attention)

**Naraku:** Hmmm... With what did you glaze the fish?

**Kagome:** (looks surprised) Eh? We didn't glaze it!

**Naraku:** Then why is it shiny and why is it slightly sweet?

**Kagome:** You don't wanna know...

**Naraku:** Yes, yes I do!

**Kagome:** (sighs) OK, but I'll have warned you! So first off, the fish wasn't too fresh, then Sesshomaru was able to make it fall into powdered sugar, then get it rolled in mint syrup, then in pepper, then he insisted it be cooked with its scales, which is absurd, but I had to comply as his eyes started having a red tinge to them, but before putting it in he was able to get it into what comes out of the backside of a dog...

**Naraku:** (faints)

**Kagura:** (eyes widen) did she say what I think she said?!

**Koga:** I am NOT tasting that!

**Fire-Bloom:** *Ahem* Well, let's say point five out of ten. Inuyasha and Kikyou are still... well... occupied... *coughbystaringateachothergoogooeyedcough* so now, the animal's team!

(To everyone's wonder and amazement, a superb fish filet in a parsley and fresh cream sauce with warm rice is served up, followed by rice, coconut, red beans and sesame balls)

**Naraku:** (eyes water) it's wonderful! Beautiful! Ten out of ten!

**Other judges:** (sniffle and agree)

**Fire-Bloom:** Well... now, it's your turn to vote! Team Kisshu and Ichigo got a four out of forty, team Keiichiro and Zakuro a thirty-two out of forty, teams Minto and Ryou, Pudding and Tart, and Inuyasha and Kikyou have zero, team Pai and Lettuce have thirty six out of forty, team Rin and Shippo have a twenty four out of forty, team Sesshomaru and Kagome have two out of forty, and finally, team animals have a forty out of forty! Remember, the losers HAVE to use the rings or pendants! Vote up, and to next time!


End file.
